Leroi Moore: 1961-2008

Dave Matthews Band saxophonist Leroi Moore passed away yesterday due to complications from a June ATV accident. We’d like to take a moment to recognize a great musician and offer our condolences to his friends and family.

bis auf wiedersehen…

We hate to disappoint our dozens and dozens of readers, but it’s summertime at Move It Move It and the wife and I will be spending the next few weeks in Germany. Until we get back, we’re leaving things in the hands of our capable janitor, Rick. So, make him feel at home, and we’ll be back in a few weeks.

“I am Iron Man.”

I’ve come to the conclusion that comic book movies have to be rated on a different scale than regular movies. I think everyone would agree that you shouldn’t walk into The Incredible Hulk expecting to see Schindler’s List. So if we rate Spiderman 3 as a one (and I really can’t stress how sh***y that movie was) and Batman Begins as a ten (which will soon be replaced by The Dark Knight), Iron Man rates about an 8.

I never really read any of the Iron Man comics, so I can’t say how faithful the movie was to that story. I can say however, that the movie did what a lot of comic book movies don’t: present it’s story in a way that doesn’t make you want to immediately call BS. As I read that back to myself it kind of sounds like I’m saying, “The movie was good because it didn’t suck,” but that’s not at all what I mean. If you can take a crazy story, about an iron man and present it in a way where I’m not thinking the entire time, “There’s no way!”, you’ve won me over.

In the movie, millionaire playboy and weapons magnate Tony Stark is attacked and captured by terrorists during a missile demonstration. They make him a deal, build them a batch of Jericho missiles — the newest and most high-tech in Stark’s arsenal — and they’ll let him live. Instead, he builds an Iron Man suit and kicks everyone’s ass. And as I watched this magnificent superhero single-handedly defeating the forces of terror I knew America’s path and the cause of freedom was righteous and true, and I went home and enlisted in the Army. No but seriously, can you imagine?

Standing in Tony’s way is Obadiah Stane, who’s been secretly selling Stark brand weapons to terrorists and wants to use the Iron Man technology for his own gain. When Tony finds out that it was Stane who engineered his capture in the first place, the gloves come off, and all sorts of smash-’em-up-bad-assery ensues.

SPOILER ALERT!

Casting Robert Downey Jr. as Tony Stark was a stroke of genius. He was really able to sell the idea that Iron Man is a different kind of superhero. He’s not a Superman or Spiderman, who lives somewhat insulated from his actions behind a secret identity. By the end of the movie, the world knows who he is and what he’s been doing. I loved Jeff Bridges as Obadiah Stane, although every time I saw him on screen I wanted to say, “Yeah, it-it’s a, it’s a bummer, man.” And special kudos to the filmmakers for making me like Gwyneth Paltrow, a feat that before seeing this movie I thought impossible.

It’s always struck me as funny that these days, movies like this have sequels and franchises built into them, and I don’t think there’s any question that we’ll see at least two more Iron Man movies. I’m wondering where they’ll take the whole thing. Anyone who stays for the secret ending after the credits knows that reference is made to superhero group The Avengers. Terrance Howard plays James Rhodes, who in the comics eventually becomes War Machine. And the terrorist group responsible for Tony’s kidnapping is The Ten Rings, backed by Iron Man’s comic book nemesis The Mandarin, so there’s plenty of material there for a few sequels.

Too often, we walk out of superhero movies feeling disappointed, so it was nice coming out of this one thinking that the filmmakers had done things right. Don’t wait for the DVD, catch this one in theaters.

8 out of 10 stars

Thoughts on the movie? Share them in the comments section.

*splooge*

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And Batman smash!

G.I. Joooooooooooooooooooooe!

Here are some shots from the upcoming hyper-realistic G.I. Joe movie, showing us once again that fighting terrorism isn’t as important as looking hot while you’re doing it. Will this movie be any good? Who knows? Who cares? Because we’ll be there, one way or the other. Head over to figures.com for more pics.

Corporate Headquarters

Do you like Star Trek? Well, we love it! And we’ve got a scoop that will make your lightsabers quiver in semi-sexual anticipation!

Surprise! Originally posted over on Ain’t It Cool, these pictures give fans a sneak peek at Star Trek XI, which will be warp driving into theaters May 2009. The pics are top secret, so if Paramount says anything make sure to tell them these aren’t the droids they’re looking for!

Part 1 - Join or Die

Better late than never, right? I’ve come to the conclusion that HBO is the best cable network EVAR. With networks like Showtime and even AMC biting at their heels, HBO delivers a quality of entertainment that you’re really not going to find anywhere else. Especially now, with shows like The Sopranos and The Wire having joined the ranks of the dearly departed, and with the television landscape having gone nutty nuts in the past few years, big productions are what it takes to snag viewers. Luckily, John Adams delivers. In fact, you could say, it’s revolutionary! Oh I hate myself.

Adams takes a look at America’s second president unlike anything we’ve seen on-screen. And unlike coach whoever’s class in high school, you actually come away feeling like you’ve learned something. In part 1 of a 7-part miniseries, we see Adams begin as a simple, Baystate lawyer who rises through the ranks to become a simple, Baystate lawyer on his way to join the Continental Congress. The journey from point A to point B is interesting, as we see anti-British sentiment rising throughout Boston. Adams’ decision to represent a group of British soldiers charged with massacring innocent civilians shows us both his character and his desire to see justice served. The fact that the soldiers weren’t found guilty and strung up shows us exactly how good a lawyer he was. After the trial, Adams, having made a name for himself, is singled out by the British and Revolutionaries both as someone they want on their side. Of course, we know who Adams chose to go with.

The production value here is fantastic. And that’s all around, costumes, sets, FX. As far as Revolutionary War-era films go, you won’t see anything that looks better than this. Of course, there aren’t that many to choose from, but still. Paul Giamatti and Laura Linney are brilliant in their performances. In the beginning, their scenes together seem so short, but we get such a sense of how much they relied on each other. So far I’ve really enjoyed Danny Huston as Samuel Adams, a character who seems at once both sinister and benign. Next up is Part 2: Independence. Will Sam Adams finally give the others a taste of that new ale he’s been raving about? Join us next time and find out!

Arthur C. Clarke: 1917-2008

We’ve lost a giant. Arthur C. Clarke was one of the Founding Fathers of science fiction and the author of such classics as 2001, Rendezvous with Rama and Childhood’s End. He passed away at his home in Sri Lanka after breathing complications. He was 90 years old.

Russia to US: “I think we should see other people.”

MOSCOW - Speaking this afternoon at a press conference in the Kremlin, Russian President Vladimir Putin announced that his country would be ending it’s 17-year relationship with the United States.

“You know, after such a long time, you get comfortable. And you kind of don’t want to admit that you might be doing something wrong,” Putin said. His remarks were met with suspicious glares from a throng of attending reporters. “It’s just that things are so messed up with this whole Prime Minister thing. I just don’t feel like I can handle a serious relationship right now,” he stammered. “I think we should see other people.” Looking as if a great weight had been lifted off his shoulders, Putin spoke heavily on how America had tried to change the former world power. “At first it was just small stuff, like only hanging out with their friends. They’d say ‘We’ll hang out with your friends next week,’ but it’d never happen. And then like the next day they’d tell me that I needed to start releasing political prisoners and providing jobs for people. It was just unhealthy, man.”

The Russian President said that his country would wait an appropriate amount of time before jumping back onto the international dating scene, stating his desire that Russia not “look like a slut.” Until then, Putin said the country would be taking a little time off. “I don’t know. Go on a road trip. Work out, read, consolidate political and military power. Just get my head straight.”

The press conference ended on an upbeat note, with Putin reiterating hopes that Russia and America would remain friends. “I mean, yeah. Like, definitely. Shoot me an e-mail, and we’ll like, go out for drinks or something,” he said, smiling unconvincingly.

America could not be reached for comment. In a prepared statement, America’s best friend, England, said, “They’re better off without that a**hole. Just watch, Russia and China will hook up like, next week. What a dick.”

Stuff White People Like - Guitar Hero

White people are commonly split into two categories: those who play guitar and those who wish they could play guitar. Those who can play enjoy sitting in the quad, impressing passersby with pieces of Stairway to Heaven or Time of Your Life, while those who can’t sit nearby, imagining what life might be like if they could play.

For the musically ungifted, there’s Guitar Hero, a videogame in which the focus is not on musical talent, but on mashing different buttons in time with four songs you’ve heard of and twenty you haven’t. Guitar Hero has provided a way for white people to live their dreams of fame and stardom vicariously through their Playstations and XBoxes. Truly it has revolutionized the gaming industry, but more importantly, people’s dreams.

Of course, the game alone is worthless unless there’s someone nearby to show off to, and for this reason white people often throw Guitar Hero parties. The opportunities provided here are twofold: 1) They’re able to impress their friends with their painstakingly-learned button-smashing abilities and 2) White people are able to display creativity by dressing up in costumes. Dressing up comes with the added benefit of making them the center of attention (something white people also love) while making a beer run to HEB or Albertson’s. Running through the aisles knocking things over and laughing like twelve-year-olds is a way of asking those around them, “Don’t you wonder what we’re up to?” In an ironic twist, those they encounter couldn’t care less and take necessary steps to avoid them, or hilariously lampoon them by taking their picture and writing about it on their blog.

Even more exciting than Guitar Hero is the release of Rock Band, a game which allows white people to play not only guitar, but bass and drums as well. This is especially exciting for white bass players and girls. The bass players, who have always lived in the shadow of their black counterparts, and the girls, who are naturally bad at all video games. The game also allows players to sing, which has it’s pros and cons. Unlike guitar and drums, it provides no way to cover up the player’s complete lack of talent, but it does call back to white people’s natural love of karaoke.

**Was the above post cleverly written commentary on a popular blog that’s currently taking America and much of the Third World by storm, or a cheap ripoff written out of jealousy (and a little spite)? You decide!